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七律。武陵人进山城（新韵）<font class="jammer">/ U* B) K+ ]. N/ n) [. \' T% p</font><br>
<font class="jammer">" Q% R* K8 \ m4 q9 b. _7 j</font><br>
一去千山万壑深，<br>
<span style="display:none">+ q! R) _$ S: z1 [7 t7 s; l</span>只缘儿女问前程。<br>
<span style="display:none">! }7 M" }( \! r: U0 T" u</span>桃花经雨飘春榭，<br>
<span style="display:none">' `8 J" b9 K8 _2 A, g</span>杏叶迎风落画亭。<br>
<span style="display:none">3 w3 ?' |# q2 w8 T$ c1 l r9 l Z</span>穿梭铁甲留残影，<br>
<span style="display:none">' j8 o0 A' J6 _7 y; I% {, N</span>揽月云楼眩惧睛。<br>
<span style="display:none">$ D, S4 U# \2 b }</span>回观两岸繁华地，<br>
<span style="display:none">& I* A: ^& P G9 D- H o</span>憔悴巴人彳亍行。<font class="jammer">' D( X1 Z; D6 R# \. X8 S</font><br>
<font class="jammer">( W8 Z) s# B4 {3 v" v; I9 j</font><br>
注：孤雁入群格（新韵）<br>
<span style="display:none">% N# C! x! S; C' N4 m: k! Z" N</span>礼拜天到山城看读高中的儿子，<br>
<span style="display:none">; ~; v T4 P! I5 L. @1 @6 T* |</span>大巴上寂寞，用手机写首小诗遣怀。</td></tr></tbody></table>
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<h2>标题</h2>
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<i class="pstatus"> 本帖最后由 潜龙 于 2011-12-8 09:40 编辑 </i><font class="jammer">8 W0 C1 P1 M7 Z! p9 U* f</font><br>
<br>
<span style="display:none">* p$ O1 ^, @* q' D, Y; U, R</span> <font class="jammer">( y9 |; A% j- }- y6 v</font><br>
<font size="3"><font color="navy">改一下：<font class="jammer">% I6 h- F0 }& P9 g q9 u</font><br>
</font></font><font class="jammer">& y2 t1 G/ T& @/ i</font><br>
<font size="3"><font color="indigo">一去千山万壑深，<font class="jammer">( w+ c* ?& M& s, q8 E( E" a) B</font><br>
只缘儿女问前程。<br>
<span style="display:none">( Z( y% [2 D8 X2 T% X I4 L7 m9 [</span>桃花经雨飘春榭，<font class="jammer">2 m* s6 W" q# e</font><br>
杏叶迎风落画亭。<font class="jammer">! z E% f* {! x3 ]" N</font><br>
铁甲穿梭江海鲤，<br>
<span style="display:none">6 b% T* d) a, L, n: X7 d</span>云楼高矗宇天兵。<font class="jammer">3 x0 S, s2 [3 ?; h" @</font><br>
回眸两岸繁华地，<br>
<span style="display:none">3 j( F* S5 p& I5 T! _ y5 z</span>憔悴巴人彳亍行。<br>
<span style="display:none">% _/ G- X* |! K: `/ N& K: n0 P</span></font><br>
<span style="display:none">9 b- F: l7 v1 S6 f2 H' o* q0 Q6 o</span></font></td></tr></tbody></table>
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一看山 山还在 山上有和尚<font class="jammer">7 i# Q- J* V6 V! K8 v$ E( l E</font><br>
一呼地 地不应 地上有黄泥<font class="jammer">% b" u9 y! h( x. B) d) T</font><br>
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:victory:</td></tr></tbody></table>
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读懂了</td></tr></tbody></table>
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:victory::victory:</td></tr></tbody></table>
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:victory::victory:</td></tr></tbody></table>
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一去千山万壑深，<br>
<span style="display:none"> x0 | C: Y+ i</span>只缘儿女问前程。<font class="jammer">5 Y5 C7 D8 i- A! Q" y4 N3 V9 B9 v</font><br>
桃花经雨飘春榭，<br>
<span style="display:none">! ^7 {; G9 j! k</span>杏叶迎风落画亭。<br>
<span style="display:none">% n9 b3 [+ C4 s o</span>铁甲穿梭江海鲤，<br>
<span style="display:none">) e0 y( G) a5 \* O- Q( E</span>云楼高矗宇天兵。<br>
<span style="display:none">4 ]0 |" C% K+ W+ s</span>回眸两岸繁华地，<font class="jammer">2 m8 ~8 w# b# f</font><br>
憔悴巴人彳亍行。<font class="jammer">; ^3 I4 v" x- ]2 `( c( I</font><br>
<font class="jammer">+ `4 F2 r; Y6 d y1 Z</font><br>
改写的好，成功的避开了‘四法同一’。这个是“孤雁出群格”，起句雁已离群了，结句归来称之“孤雁入群格”。</td></tr></tbody></table>
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:victory::victory::victory:</td></tr></tbody></table>
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<div class="quote"><blockquote><font size="2"><font color="#999999">巴壁虎 发表于 2011-12-4 17:48</font> <img id="aimg_n00QI" onclick="zoom(this, this.src, 0, 0, 0)" class="zoom" file="static/image/common/back.gif" onmouseover="img_onmouseoverfunc(this)" lazyloadthumb="1" border="0" alt=""></font></blockquote></div><font class="jammer">) K# h% R2 w3 @2 Y</font><br>
:handshake:):)</td></tr></tbody></table>
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<div class="quote"><blockquote><font size="2"><font color="#999999">不小心 发表于 2011-12-4 17:13</font> <img id="aimg_x44dT" onclick="zoom(this, this.src, 0, 0, 0)" class="zoom" file="static/image/common/back.gif" onmouseover="img_onmouseoverfunc(this)" lazyloadthumb="1" border="0" alt=""></font><br>
<span style="display:none">* j5 q9 e4 P* [+ A8 }; m</span>一去千山万壑深，<br>
<span style="display:none">3 f; ^ ]2 a1 l/ \ B c</span>只缘儿女问前程。<font class="jammer">( d5 J7 p3 E* c+ s/ ?</font><br>
桃花经雨飘春榭，</blockquote></div><font class="jammer"> q8 S; }* Q/ U</font><br>
哈哈，搞反了。:D</td></tr></tbody></table>
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拜读</td></tr></tbody></table>
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发表于 2019-4-7 16:07:58