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<i class="pstatus"> 本帖最后由 不小心 于 2011-10-8 22:27 编辑 </i><br>
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<span style="display:none">+ p2 r$ m/ K g% W</span><font face="黑体"><font size="4"><font face="楷体_GB2312">把盏东篱陌上桑，冷霜和月菊花旁。<br>
<span style="display:none">( Y9 O3 T9 `. y7 \1 k</span>等闲谁敢称癫子，一枕唐风独自香。<br>
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<span style="display:none"># G* r4 S. L* a</span>王母云屏夜半凉，蟾宫折桂暗飞霜。<br>
<span style="display:none">5 T( d4 o- ?0 x</span>为谁憔悴花癫子，清照牙床宝镜香。 <br>
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<font size="4">九重阊阖举瑶樽，我醉清风到月门。</font></font><br>
<span style="display:none">% F: {' X" {( k$ r7 w</span><font size="4"><font face="楷体_GB2312">浪迹天涯为异客，冷香盈袖自销魂。 </font></font><font class="jammer">4 m+ x; `( ` }9 z( ~) |: b' a</font><br>
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<font face="黑体"><font size="4"><font size="4"><font face="楷体_GB2312">头上弯盘似水凉，菊丛凝露柳丝长。</font></font><br>
<span style="display:none">, Y7 m1 t% L3 a4 A0 O: G</span><font size="4"><font face="楷体_GB2312">草坪一个花癫子，清守篱边那冷香。<font class="jammer">! f/ ~1 }. A8 h3 p. d7 \2 k5 G3 B _, _</font><br>
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</font></font><font size="4"><font face="楷体_GB2312">一树星辉独自凉，飞花逐月小轩窗。漫随思绪来廊外，闲拨书笺卧路旁。<br>
<span style="display:none">$ |; j3 N- f4 d- R9 l. Z! g1 _+ @</span>石菊凝烟三点雨，猪笼打草半天荒。夜深还向秋风里，许是桥边有冷香。</font></font><font class="jammer">! i$ L% P3 G7 y) ?</font><br>
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<span style="display:none">) [' F5 X5 w1 u/ e</span><font size="4"><font face="楷体_GB2312">附浪石烟雨唱和：<font class="jammer">( j; J3 ?- L% a- G# _1 j. y5 B</font><br>
先天不足醉重阳，才谢芙蓉菊又黄。</font></font> <font class="jammer">+ `; i' k3 l- C</font><br>
<font size="4"><font face="楷体_GB2312">隔壁阿飞车得转，花前柳不影成行。<br>
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;P;P;P;P</td></tr></tbody></table>
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:lol:lol</td></tr></tbody></table>
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:lol:lol</td></tr></tbody></table>
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<font size="5">再和无痕君一首</font><br>
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<font size="5">竹篱残香落日斜，若寻金菊到陶家。</font><br>
<span style="display:none">0 h9 C% e* a* X8 ~0 U. ^9 o</span><font size="5">癫子自是云中客，不是花痴不爱花。</font><br>
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<div class="quote"><blockquote><font size="2"><font color="#999999">潜龙 发表于 2011-10-8 22:04</font> <img id="aimg_oj8FE" onclick="zoom(this, this.src, 0, 0, 0)" class="zoom" file="static/image/common/back.gif" onmouseover="img_onmouseoverfunc(this)" lazyloadthumb="1" border="0" alt=""></font><br>
<span style="display:none">& X5 C/ }7 d7 d5 k</span>再和无痕君一首<font class="jammer">3 V; j5 j2 s0 W% E7 q% E</font><br>
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<span style="display:none">2 z# }$ S" C7 s# \# s</span>竹篱残香落日斜，若寻金菊到陶家。</blockquote></div><font class="jammer">9 V" n/ u a% x5 X% s$ j M+ @1 u</font><br>
癫子自是云中客 子（仄声）出律，不如直写 花癫自是花间客，不是花痴不爱花。四个花字巧妙铺叙也是一种风致呢！</td></tr></tbody></table>
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<span style="display:none"> G& g3 B; A) z7 |& O6 ^3 q- o t, e</span><font size="4">依君之改，妙哉。</font><font class="jammer"># k" ^# t0 |* |+ G</font><br>
<font size="5">竹篱残香落日斜，若寻金菊到陶家。<font class="jammer">/ \ C0 x& s: i9 |: A</font><br>
花癫自是花间客，不是花痴不爱花。<font class="jammer">: u4 f) w8 v' ?# E0 l; z. Z" }$ e</font><br>
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<div class="quote"><blockquote><font size="2"><font color="#999999">潜龙 发表于 2011-10-8 23:10</font> <img id="aimg_Pxl4A" onclick="zoom(this, this.src, 0, 0, 0)" class="zoom" file="static/image/common/back.gif" onmouseover="img_onmouseoverfunc(this)" lazyloadthumb="1" border="0" alt=""></font><br>
<span style="display:none">5 n5 d$ g3 \( d& ^2 _, s7 F</span>依君之改，妙哉。<br>
<span style="display:none">. r3 L* e. p1 a: ~) D+ |1 Y</span>竹篱残香落日斜，若寻金菊到陶家。<font class="jammer">: ]! O4 L, C4 j7 r2 |$ y; Q</font><br>
花癫自是花间客，不是花痴不爱花。</blockquote></div><br>
<span style="display:none">) A; Z8 [* a! d9 \</span>我们还看漏了一字 篱字 此处应该是个仄声字 何不改为 竹苑 </td></tr></tbody></table>
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谢谢!我对韵律掌握得还不够，特别是今、古之别，有时都要还查字典求实，才敢用字，还得学习。</td></tr></tbody></table>
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<i class="pstatus"> 本帖最后由 不小心 于 2011-10-10 10:03 编辑 </i><br>
<span style="display:none">4 X6 L& {# L1 x5 S3 q5 d</span><div class="quote"><blockquote><font size="2"><font color="#999999">潜龙 发表于 2011-10-9 12:32</font> <img id="aimg_C6tkM" onclick="zoom(this, this.src, 0, 0, 0)" class="zoom" src="http://www.cqxs |
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发表于 2019-4-7 16:07:58